为何美国人不那么介意跟单身妈妈谈恋爱？

　　作者沈睿思，这才是美国驻休斯顿记者。
　　现在社会的宽容度越来越大，即便在中国，人们对单亲妈妈的看法也比以往包容了许多，这点中国美国现在差不了太多了。但是说到再婚，中美的态度就有些不同了。小编查看了几个国内的论坛，大家是这么回答的，是不是很有代表性：
　　虽然现在社会年轻一代人的态度宽容，但是很多老一辈还是无法接受自己的儿子娶一个结过婚带着孩子的姑娘。而中国的传统观念，又是要尊重父母的意见。但客观来讲，父母的反对其实也是有道理的。单亲妈妈比谁都更心疼孩子，很多妈妈甚至为了不委屈自己的孩子而不愿意和第二任老公再生宝宝。传宗接代观念在中国又如此根深蒂固，这就是许多单亲妈妈再婚之路上亮起的红灯。
　　对于美国人来说，他们对单亲妈妈的态度更加宽容。在美国文化中，不管是在孩子还是父母的观念里，一旦孩子们成年了，他们就是一个独立的个体，父母能干涉的就很少了。加上美国离婚率常年居高不下，很多孩子都是在单亲家庭，或者重组家庭中成长起来的，所以对于交往一个单亲妈妈，美国男士是这样表示的：
　　＂My mom was a single mom most of my childhood, so I have tons of respect for single mothers. I would absolutely go on a date with a single mom and see where it could lead. I don’t have kids, but I want kids, so if she already has one or two, it would be a bonus. I would just be really cautious about getting close to the kid, because if it didn’t work out, I’d feel bad if the kid got attached, then hurt.＂ –Jonah, 37
　　＂我小的时候我妈妈就是一个单身母亲，所以我对她们非常尊重。我肯定会跟单身母亲约会的，然后看看我们能发展到什么程度。我还没有孩子，但是我想要一个，所以如果她已经有一个或两个孩子了，那我就赚到了。我会努力跟孩子们搞好关系，因为孩子是我们关系成败的关键。但是如果孩子跟我太亲近，然后我们又分手，对孩子的伤害会很大哦，我也会难过的。＂
　　——约拿，37岁
　　＂It’s not the ideal situation for me. It seems like baggage and I wouldn’t want to be involved in any baby-daddy drama.＂–Christopher, 22
　　＂这不是我的理想状态，（跟单亲妈妈交往）感觉像背着一个包袱，而且我不想掺合进任何她和她孩子爸爸的纠纷中。＂
　　——克里斯提夫，22岁
　　＂It’s not about her being a mom. If I’m attracted to her and we have stuff in common, I’d date her.＂ –Lou, 28
　　＂这跟她是不是妈妈没关系，如果我喜欢她而且我们有共同点，那我会跟她约会。＂
　　——鲁，28岁
　　＂I think it would be a pain. My friend dated a single mom and she was always breaking plans because of childcare issues, or suggesting he just come over and watch a movie. I’m young and I want to have fun, out in the world, not be tied down to someone’s living room while her kid sleeps in the bedroom. Also, my friend’s ex had a kid that always wanted to sleep in his mom’s bed and that would be a problem for me. I’m a man. I want all the perks that come with a grown-up relationship.＂ –Jason, 31
　　＂我觉得这不行，我有个朋友就是在和单亲妈妈约会，但是她总是因为孩子改变计划，要不然就是叫他来家里看电影。我还年轻，我喜欢刺激，喜欢冒险。而不是被困在谁的客厅里，而她对孩子正在隔壁睡觉。还有，我朋友的前女友的小孩老是想睡在他妈的卧室里，这个我也不能接受。我是个男人，我想要所有成熟感情里应该有的好处。＂
　　——杰森，31岁
　　＂A lot of my friends are porced and one guy even has a kid after a one-night stand. I wouldn’t judge a woman if she had kids. You never know what life is gonna throw you. Maybe her husband died. Maybe she’s like my friend and had a baby after just dating someone. I admire my friend for being a stand-up guy and taking care of his son, so my opinion of a woman doing the same … would be the same. It’s awesome.＂ –Kevin, 41
　　＂我很多朋友都离过婚，还有一个男的竟然在一夜情之后有了一个孩子。我不会看不起带孩子的女性，因为你永远不知道生活会给你什么样的惊吓，她可能丧偶，或者像我朋友一样，约会时不小心怀孕。我很佩服我那位朋友，他承担起了责任，并且很好的照顾了他儿子。所以我对单亲妈妈的态度是一样的，（她们）很棒。＂
　　——凯文，41岁
　　＂Not sure. I dated a single mom who had a lot of issues with her ex and I found that I got sucked into a lot of drama. Also, her ex had issues with me being around his daughter because he was threatened by the relationship that was forming. It just seemed like there was always something standing in the way of us really moving forward.＂ –Dave, 35
　　＂我不确定，我和一个单亲妈妈交往过，她跟她前夫之间有很多问题，后来我发现我也深深陷入这些问题中。那个男的也不喜欢我出现在她女儿身边，因为他觉得我们之间建立的感情会威胁到他。总之就是感觉我和她之间总是有一股阻力，影响着我们关系的发展。＂
　　——大卫，35岁
　　＂Single moms are the norm, aren’t they? I wouldn’t assume she is any better or worse off than a single woman. Sure, I’d date her.＂ –Joey, 28
　　＂单身母亲是正常人没错吧？我不会把她看的比一个普通单身女人更好或者更坏。所以没错，我会跟她约会的。＂
　　——乔伊，28岁
　　不管是哪里，男士们对接受单亲妈妈多少还是有些顾虑。但是相比之下，单亲妈妈在美国的再婚机会比较大。
　　不管社会福利多好，社会态度有多宽容，在哪个国家，单亲母亲要面对的困难都比普通家庭多一倍。她们就算再婚了，也会有一段时期要独自面对孩子的教育，要面面俱到，要挣钱养家。母亲伟大，单身家庭的母亲很伟大，在中国当单亲妈妈更伟大。